It is extremely easy, when you are young, to allow all the wrong things to define who you are. I suspect the same is true even for older people, but luckily I’m not quite old enough to confirm that. Then again, I’m 25. That’s old relative to some, isn’t it?
By now I “should” know certain things. Things like: what I want to be now that I’m grown up (because OMG I am grown up), where I stand on touchy issues (gay marriage, the migrant crisis, to be or not to be a Belieber), how I like to have my coffee (any self-respecting adult knows this, k), who I’m voting for in 2016 (yikes), and even who I want to spend the rest of my life with (double yikes).
I don’t have “answers” for more than half of those things. And I won’t waste time in making a rather obvious point here: Even if I had the answers, they wouldn’t define me. My opinions and desires count for a lot, but they don’t constitute my entire being. They are not (and will never be) static. I am not static.
What sucks is that society seeks — almost demands— certainty. Certainty makes others feel comfortable. It allows them to place you in the world. It’s an I know what you do therefore I know who you are way of thinking; grossly oversimplified of course, but you get what I mean.